You know, in the wake of the whole Imus thing and considering the human degradation present in urban/rap/hip-hop culture, I've come to a conclusion:
We Caucasian-Americans don't have a word of our own.
I mean, we are a race, right? We're not exempt from being considered a race because we're pasty-white. I just think we're missing something that unifies us as a people.
Take a look at Snoop. We can insert any big-time rapper, but let's look at him for a second since he's arguably one of the most famous. When he encounters a bunch of other African-Americans he hasn't seen in a while, they all do that halfway hug thing and might even drop a "What's up my n***a?"
We Caucasian-Americans don't have that, and I think we're missing out. It's costing us.
Let's say we see someone we know at the local mall or supermarket. What's the first thing we say? "Oh, HI! How are you? I haven't seen you in forever? What have you been up to??" Sometimes it's feigned and sometimes it's not. Either way, it seems kind of distant and cold and certainly not familial. Sometimes it's even delivered with one of those ass-out hugs. You know the kind I mean. That just doesn't work for me.
So, that said, and starting today, I'm taking the word "cracker" back.
It's an offensive and demeaning term that applies specificially to caucasians that we can use to strengthen our bond and unify the Caucasian-American community. Specific examples and uses include:
"How are you, Cracker?"
"Cracker, please."
"Beer me, Cracker."
"You're the dumbest Cracker ever."
"That stupid Cracker cut me off!"
"You better not be at that strip club you f***ing Cracker."
The uses are many. It would even be acceptable to substitute "crackah" for "cracker" in places like New England where use of the letter "R" seems to be at an all-time low, anyway.
We have a rich culture and a unique identity that is being downplayed and minimized on a daily basis. It's time we took it back and this can be a simple first step. No one outside of the Caucasian-American community better be calling us crackers, either. That's downright offensive. We can do it, but no one else can.
I'm taking it back. Don't hate the playah, baby, hate the game.
That game, my friends, is "reverse racism" and people like Al Sharpton practice it every single day. The double standard that exists in this country is disgusting and reprehensible. If Sharpton and Jesse Jackson and Spike Lee and anyone else in the African-American community aren't going to fight racism on their own side, then perhaps it's time we played their game.
The whole notion of my idea is patently absurd, isn't it? (This is one of those times where I'm demonstrating absurdity with absurdity for those Liberals who need it spelled out.) The scariest part is, it's so absurd that it almost makes perfect sense.
Cracker, please.
William Smith
ConservativeBlogger.com
